It's not that simple ...

With an over abundance of news stories stemming from the Newtown, CT shooting, the gun debate has heated up.
The solution isn't as simple as "lock up all the mentally unstable" or "ban all guns" - both are arguments I have seen people screaming over the Internet over the week since the shooting happened.
And by screaming, I mean, people are getting serious about the issue and typing in all caps.
Mental health professionals are trying to stress that mental illness does not always equate to violence.
Some experts suggest the mentally ill are more likely to become a victim of violence.

 The National Rifle Association (NRA) recently released a statement that an armed policeman should be placed in all schools and congress should foot the bill ... by Congress, that would be the taxpayers (you and I).
What the NRA has to say
Honestly, having an armed security guard at Sandy Hook may have not helped.
The guard would have likely only had a hand gun on him. I am not a guns expert, but I doubt it would have been a match to the semi-automatic rifle the gunman, Adam Lanza, had.

Where do we draw the line?

Here is where I am conflicted - outside of killing, what is the point of a semi-automatic assault riffle?
If you needed to defend your family or home would a rifle or handgun not be able to do that?
If you went hunting with it, would you be able to bring home meat to eat?
If someone can give me a better answer than "If I want a semi-automatic assault rifle, it is my God given right," let me hear it. I will listen.
I am trying to educate myself on this issue as well.

Some may fear that if they ban semi-automatic rifles, then it  might be easier to ban rifles next ... and then all guns. It is a very slippery slope.

But, I don't think that is what the nation as a whole wants. Banning military-grade weapons will do.
62% of Americans Now Support a Ban on Semi-Automatic Assault Rifles and Clips

I wouldn't support an ban of all guns

I wouldn't paint myself as a gun enthusiast. I do not have a gun in my home and that is by choice. But, I believe people have the right to have guns if they choose.
If someone wanted to have a handgun or rifle in their home to defend themselves or their family - by all means. But, I think a normal firearm would be sufficient.
Also, nearly my whole family hunts.
I reap the benefits of that - we love family get-togethers that involve deer fajitas and we will drop everything to attend.

Tighter restrictions on private gunshows is something I think our nation should look at

It was alarming to read in the article linked below that nearly three-quarters of our states do not have laws requiring background checks during private-party sales.
Nearly 40 percent of gun transactions in America occur through private party sales

I know that in itself would not have stopped the shooter at Sandy Hook, his mother had purchased her firearms legally. But, what about the next time? I know I sound cynical ... but in the world we live in today, there will always be a next one.

So what is the solution?

I wish I had it, but I don't. I think our country needs to look at both issues - mental health and gun control.

Read 'I am Adam Lanza's Mother'
It is a blog from a mother who has struggled dealing with her son who has mental health issues as well as the difficulties it is getting help for him.

I think we can come up with a better solution that aids people in the situation that the author, Liza Long, are in. The "until they hurt themselves or someone else" approach isn't acceptable any longer.

 We need to work on both issues. Again, I have heard the argument that we need to get the mentally ill off the street.

It is not that simple.

I think when people do say "We need to get the mentally ill off the street," they are meaning the "scary mentally ill" such as schizophrenics. In television and movies, the "scary mentally ill person" is normally portrayed as a schizophrenic.

 And yes, schizophrenics can be a threat to others or themselves when not monitored or medicated. But often, when on their medication, can live productive lives.

What is mental health?

According to the National Alliance on Mental Illness, mental health is defined as any medical condition that disrupts a person's thinking, feeling, mood, ability to relate to others and daily functioning.

I am not an expert in this field either, but I believe that would include: Down Syndrome, Depression, ADHD ADD, Anorexia, Bulimia and anxiety disorders ...

Do these people need to be off the streets?

No.

Again, I don't know what the solution is. But, I know our nation need to sit down and have this discussion sooner rather than later.

My heart breaks for Sandy Hook

As I sit here, my son, 4, is on the couch. His little tongue is sticking out as he concentrates on a reading game he is playing on the ipad. My daughter, 1, is carrying around one of her brother's hotwheels making "vroom" noises. The Christmas tree's lights illuminate the living room as we watch Sunday Night Football. It is a beautiful and picturesque moment for my little family of four.
And last Sunday, as we did practically the same thing - I took it for granted.
Tonight, I look at them and almost instantly tear up thinking about the senseless events that transpired on Friday.
There are 20 parents with kids not much older than my own, going through unimaginable pain.
I have been trying to come to grips with this tragedy since I first heard about the shootings early Friday morning.
It's like my brain can't process it right now.
It doesn't seem real.
I will never fully understand what drives someone to do something so horrific.
All I do know is someone has to be in a really dark place to shoot anyone - let alone 20 kids 7-years-old and younger.
 If I can find any solace from this horrible event is how heartwarming it is to see the stories that are emerging of the adults who risked everything - some paying the ultimate price - to save children.
Heroes inside Sandy Hook.
God bless those teachers and faculty members - every single one of them.

The down side

What does sting, is people already up in arms and debating everything from gun control to mental health.
Don't get me wrong - they're interesting and great topics for debate. But, in the perspective of the grieving families, these topics can wait ... at least a few days.
Instead of grieving for families, many work quick to voice their opinion on a wide variety of topics - from who is to blame to whether or not it could have been stopped.
I've seen the "take away all guns" argument
I've seen the old "guns don't kill people" argument.
I have seen the "sensationalized media is to blame" argument.
I've also seen an article that Westboro is planning on picketing Sandy Hook Elementary.
Westboro = not what Christianity is about

I do have strong opinions on all of the topics above ... but I will save them for another day. Maybe I will even share my own school shooting story when I do. But right now, I will grieve for the beautiful kids who lost their lives, as well as for the adults trying to save them.

One more thing

I saw this blog about a woman dealing with a child with behavioral issues. She has feared for her life and her family's. It kind of gives a perspective of the shooter's family. Before you try and judge anyone - always try to put yourself in their situation.

Here is a perspective on woman gives from possibly the mother of the shooters perspective.

To Whom It May Concern

I have to believe that when things you want to come to fruition fall through, it is only because God has greater things planned for you.
I truly believe that ... at the same time, I have to get it out of my brain and this is my way to give it up to God.

A little back story:

Chuck has been wanting to get back into a high school around here since we moved to Fort Worth in '08. When he found his job with a sports rehabilitation clinic, who contracts him out to the Fort Worth Cats in the summer, we thought it would likely be a one-year gig. So did his boss. He is a nice guy, but a realist - it is hard to keep someone in a job that travels three-fourths of a summer. Chuck being a family man, he knew this job was likely a stepping stone to get him to Fort Worth. Fast forward four years - Chuck still has the same job. He has mentioned to his boss that he would like go back to a high school.

Answer to our prayers?

So when an opening for an athletic trainer came about at the private schools where his boss' son attends, he gave Chuck a heads up. It just so happens that the manager of the Fort Worth Cats works there too during the school year.
With those two references, Chuck is a shoe in, right?
We start to get excited. He had his first interview in early June and it went well. He did mention at some point during the interview process that he would be out of town pretty much the complete second half of July.
 He ended up getting a call back saying he was in the running for the job with one other candidate. However, he was told the headmaster would be out of town for another week or so. Chuck just had this crazy feeling that they wouldn't call back until when he was on the road.
Flash forward to this week - Chuck gets a call back day 2 of an 11 day road trip that the headmaster wanted to meet with him the following day. He explained it all over again about how he was out of town. The secretary told him she would call him back once she found out what the head master wanted to do. The secretary called Chuck back and basically told him they would hold on to his resume, but since he couldn't come in this week, he was out of the running for the job.
I am not sure why there was such a lag between first and second interview, but Chuck getting dismissed like that over something out of his control just kind of crushed my heart. I know he wanted to get into a high school so bad. And this one sounded great.

Then I got mad and felt helpless ...

I felt helpless because Chuck got the news on the road. I wanted to be there for him to console him, or just be there to talk. But, since he was on the bus we had the convo via text. And, my phone hates me so I only got every other text .... made it very confusing to follow. Then, I started thinking about how awesome Chuck is at his job. I have never met someone with such a strong work ethic or so great at their job. And all I could think was: "This fancy smancy headmaster will never know what an awesome employee he missed out on." And yes, I literally thought that, my brain still thinks in five-year-old terms.
 So, I decided to write a letter.
*disclaimer* Chuck if you're reading this, I am not going to actually send the letter, don't worry! BUT, if I did ... this is how awesome it would be ....

The Letter ...

Headmaster Fancy Smancy Pants:

Congratulations on hiring your new athletic trainer. I am glad my husband being out of town on business made it an easy decision narrowing two candidates down to one. That pretty much was a no brainer decision for you. I am confident that the other candidate is capable of fulfilling the job requirements since they did make it to the top two, but I am afraid to inform you that you missed out on the best candidate.
Chuck was and is the best candidate for this job in so many ways. I could give you hundreds of reasons, but I will give you the key points.
Chuck does not simply fulfill the job requirements. He goes above and beyond every single day to help players get back on the field as quick as possible and to prevent them from getting injured. He is also very knowledgeable in his field, have 10 years of expierence and is an asset to whomever he works for.
As you know, Chuck is in his 4th season with the Fort Worth Cats Baseball Team. On average, he works 65 hours a week during baseball season. He is salary, so there is no overtime. He doesn't complain about the hours because he loves what he does. We, as a family, also make it work.
When players move to here for the summer to play, a lot of them do not have cars. In previous seasons, they have been put up in apartments in Burleson. This season, they are in host homes all over the metroplex. During off hours, Chuck has driven players to and from doctors appointments when they're hurt or sick.There have also been too many times where Chuck has sat in the waiting room alone for hours on a guy to come out of surgery. He doesn't mind waiting, he just wants the player to know they're not alone.
 I don't care how big and tough a baseball player is, surgery is scary and they should never have to go through it alone. I thank God that Chuck is such an amazing man, that he will put in the extra effort for his players. The Cats are in a new league this year and subtle things have changed. For instance, the home teams do not provide food for the players most of the time. It is kind of hit or miss. The players are either having to buy concession food, which isn't the best, or they're having to go without food daily from about 3-to-11 p.m. That may not sound like much time, but when they're playing in sweltering heat, a small and healthy meal after batting practice and before the game goes a long way. My husband has recently begun using his own money to buy the players healthy food as a pre-game meal. He doesn't complain. In fact, Chuck said he has noticed a difference in how they're playing with and without the meal.
While working in high schools, Chuck is a champion for the kids. He has had to make difficult decisions not to let a kid continue in a game, despite the child, a parent or a coach pressuring him to allow the kid to return to the game. But, he will not be swayed. Chuck truly cares about the well-being of the students. He believes he is responsible for their well-being while they're on the field. And he loves helping them get back to playing as fast as he can.
I never tire of listening to Chuck's stories about how a player made they winning run or scored the winning point in their first game back after injury. He gets so excited when he can help a player have a speedy recovery.
I truly hope you have made the right choice with your default candidate of choice. I am at peace with it now as well. I don't know what God's will is or what plan he has in store, but it has to be better than your school.

Sincerely,
Adrian

 How was that?

In this type of job, not much recognition is given. Honeslty, I don't think Chuck wants recognition.
But, I just felt like I needed to give a shout out to my totally awesome hubster! The ones that matter, know how great you are!

Athletic trainers' jobs are hard, but rewarding and the hours are mostly terrible. The pay isn't horrible, but with the hours they put in, it isn't wonderful either. It is enough to get by, and we are grateful for that! And besides that he is in the line of work that he loves. I wish this school would know what kind of jewel they're missing out on. Then again, ignornace is bliss.

Dallas shooting

It is Hump Day News Day.
Dallas officer shot and killed an unarmed suspect Tuesday.
Guns, drugs seized after Dallas officer killed suspect, police report
A Dallas police officer shot and killed a suspect yesterday after fleeing from police officers. According to The Star-Telegram reports, James Harper, 31, was killed by police Officer Brian Rowden after Harper and three other men fled from the house while officers tried to enter the residence. Harper and Officer Rowden jumped over three fences, the final fence led into a horse corral, where Harper turned and began to fight Rowden.
Allegedly, Harper also told Officer Rowden something to the effect of "you're going to have to kill me ..."
After Harper was killed, it was learned that he dodn't have a gun, but he had been fighting with Officer Rowden to the point where he was "overheated and exhausted, and fearing for his life," according to the police report.
A press release included a list of items seized from the house where Harper fled from, according to The Star-Telegram. A 9 mm pistol, a 12-gauge shotgun, marijuana, PCP, crack cocaine both inside and outside the residence, Xanex and hydrocodone, were among items found. There were also nine cellphones, digital scales and a partial drug ledger were found in the home, according to reports. There was also $437 found in Harper's right front pants pocket, according to The Star-Telegram reports.

Read more here: http://www.star-telegram.com/2012/07/25/4126453/guns-drugs-seized-after-dallas.html#storylink=cpy

Read more here: http://www.star-telegram.com/2012/07/25/4126453/guns-drugs-seized-after-dallas.html#storylink=cpy

Read more here: http://www.star-telegram.com/2012/07/25/4126453/guns-drugs-seized-after-dallas.html#storylink=cpy

By Tuesday night extra officers, some dressed in riot gear, went to the area to try and clam a crowd gathering where the incident occured.
Tragic, but Neccesary?
I can't imagine putting my life on the line everyday. Like many that have come before him, Officers Rowden can. And, the police do it daily for us. I am sure cops don't ever want to have to draw their weapon, but it is neccesary in some situations. I am not a cop, but I am guessing that is the last thing they want. This, to me, was one of those times it was needed. If a suspect is fighting hand-to-hand combat with you, won't give up and has the oppurtunity to go for your gun once you're exhausted from fighting with him - you bet you're life is threatened.
On the other side of the coin, I try and identify with Harper's family. Would I stand by my realitive - right, wrong or otherwise? I don't know, to be honest. Often, we are blinded when it comes to those we love. We only see the good in those we love. Here's what I do know though, if Harper didn't run, fight and attack Officer Rowden, he'd be alive. He'd be in jail, but alive nonetheless.

Read more here: http://www.star-telegram.com/2012/07/25/4126453/guns-drugs-seized-after-dallas.html#storylink=cpy

June 17th ... Yeah, it's a pretty cool date!

I cannot believe we will be celebrating our 6 year anniversary tomorrow!
Time flies when you're having fun I guess ...
I still get butterflies in my stomach when I think about those first few months of our budding romance.
I hope I never forget!
We met Feb. 21, 2004.
My best friend and I decided to go out to a pool hall. This wasn't our normal Saturday night, but whatever.
She also happened to invite two friends to come. She hadn't talked to them in awhile, but she remembered that Chuck liked to play pool.
I didn't really think anything of it.
I wasn't full on anti-relationship at the time, but I wasn't too concerned about finding "the one"either.
That all changed that night.
As soon as we walked in, Bethany recognized Casey and we went over for introductions.
I remember thinking, "hmm seems like a nice guy ..." and then, Chuck walked up from the bar - he had just got a pool table.
As soon as I saw him, I was smitten.
He had on a blue T-shirt, some relax fit blue jeans and I backwards hat. (I still love it when Chuck wears his hat like that.)
His eyes were the prettiest blue.
He was cute.
And then, he began singing along to the jukebox. In fact, it was "Wave on Wave" by Pat Green.
That did it for me.
He sounded amazing.
I was already falling hard - but naturally, I didn't want to freak out this totally amazing dude. So, I played it cool.
We played a few games and then decided to finish off the night at Denny's, I mean, why not?
We parted ways, but I couldn't stop thinking about him.
I am pretty sure I didn't sleep that night.
We all hung out as a group the following weekend.
I pretty much acted like an awkward dork (that is what I do best.)
He was funny, cute, had a great head on his shoulders and was responsible yet fun.
I fell harder for my future husband!
I finally told my bestie that weekend that I had fallen hard for her friend.
I was still trying to play it cool, but I was acting a fool.
I am kind of embarrassed to admit this next part, but I will ...
At the time Chuck worked for the Wichita Falls Rustlers Hockey Team and their picture happened to be on the local phone book ... I would stare at that dang picture at least 50 times a day. It didn't matter where I was - work, school or the apartment.
My coworkers that I was nuts. I THOUGHT I was going nuts.
Meanwhile, Chuck was oblivious to my feelings.
I was still trying to play it cool and I am a bit old fashioned - I felt that the boy needed to approach the girl for a date.
I was loosing my mind.
Finally my bestie took Chuck aside and basically asked point blank "Do you like my friend? Because she really likes you ..."
Literally from the moment the secret was out, we became inseparable.
If we weren't together, we were on the phone.
Sometimes we would talk until 5 a.m.
Once I missed a final because we stayed up talking too late and I slept through my alarm.
Luckily, my professor let me make up my exam ....
We went on our first official date on March 12 - we ate at On the Border and saw 50 First Dates. Chuck wore a white and blue plaid shirt with some nice jeans and some dock martin boots.
By this time, I knew he was the man I was going to marry.
BUT, that scared me. I was only 20 years old. I thought that was too young to find my future husband.
I didn't want to scare the guy off. We only knew each other for three weeks or so.
But, by my 21st birthday that following month, I let the cat out of the bag. I remember telling my besties that I would marry Chuck. I still didn't tell him, but I let it be known! I don't know how I knew, but I was so sure it was going to happen.
By our year anniversary, I was so in love with that man. I had had decent relationships in the past. And I had thought I had been in love before. But, it was clear after meeting Chuck, that the relationships beforehand weren't love. It was more "Hey, I think I like you."
 I didn't think I could love him more.
And then July 4th happened.
Chuck proposed under fireworks with his family cheering in the background.
AND, not only did he ask my dad for my hand in marriage - he asked my mom,brother and sisters.
That always stuck out to me. I loved that he dd that because I am insanely close to my family!
Our wedding day was awesome!
Chuck sang One Emotion by Clint Black during the ceremony.
And again, I fell in love EVEN MORE with this man!
I had my fairytale wedding to my very own prince and we have been living the dream ever since.
Now, saying that everything hasn't been technically perfect - there have been trials and tribulations - but everything that we have gone through, we have done it together. And, we are stronger for it.
That is how a real-life fairytale happens folks!
Again, I didn't think I could love him more than I did on the day we got married ...
Then we found out we were pregnant ,,,
Then we had Jake ... I loved him even more seeing him holding our son ...
THEN we had our baby girl.
I love seeing him with our daughter. It is so amazing! God knew what he was doing when he gave Chuck a little girl!
So, I can only assume my love for my man will only continue growing with time.
I can't wait to find out!

Mamas Don't Let Your Babies Grow Up To Be Mean Girls

I think it is safe to say that no mamma wants their daughter to be a "Mean Girl."
At least, I hope no mom has that aspiration for their little beauties.
 According to About.com (the tween edition) here is the difinition:

 "Mean Girls" is a tween expression used to describe girls who exhibit anti-social behavior known as Relational Aggression. The term was popularized by the movie Mean Girls, starring Lindsay Lohan. Mean girl behavior includes gossip, verbal put downs of others, bullying, backstabbing, and using others to get ahead. 

Mean girls can be found at school, on the bus, and at extra-curricular activities. They are particularly good at turning friend against friend, and they target girls who they are jealous of, or who stick out from the crowd. Mean girls thrive on drama, and often resort to cyberbullying to torment their victims.
Also Known As: Divas, Gossip Girls, Meanies, Frenemy, Relational Aggression, Queen Bees, and Poison Pals.

My son and his friend had the joys of  meeting  a duo of mean girls today at the park.
Before I get further into the story, let me throw this disclaimer out: My son is not perfect. Nor is he completely innocent all of the time. He is 4, he is rambunctious and sometimes can be a little rough.
I had a play date today with three other mamas and the majority of kiddos happened to be boys and were 3 and 4-year-olds.
My son and one of his buddies' attention was captured by two little girls. At first, I thought they were precious. Then, I quickly found that they were mean girls in the making.
 They found the girls playing on the jungle gym.
I laughed because the boys were being pirates and the girls were magic butterflies. The little girls ran to this little pink toy car that was attached to a spring.
The little boys were quick to follow.
At first, they headed over to the blue springy car. But, it wasn't long before the girls caught their attention again.
The girls were inside a pink toy car and the boys were hanging out by it.
I made a comment to one of my girlfriends that I was in trouble because Jake was already girl crazy ...
It was cute, all four kiddos were smiling.
All of the sudden one of the moms came from across the playground, came up to the two boys and faux-politely asked them to leave the girls alone.
 I was a little confused to what the problem was.
I felt the mamma bear in me start to growl.
My little boy and his friend weren't doing anything wrong.
I was watching them play because I thought it was cute they were chatting up two little girls. The girls' mothers weren't paying as much attention because they were pushing little kids on the baby swings.
In this case, the little boys were being awesome and prior to the mother asking them to get lost, I was proud of how they were playing.

So, back to taming the mama bear beast I had growling inside ....
I got up and asked the boys to come play with me on the blue toy car.
I didn't address the girls or moms.
Situation diffused, right?
No.
The little guy playing with my son walked over to the pink car again. He didn't have a chance to say anything and, again, wasn't doing anything wrong.
 One of the little girls tells him that they don't want the boys near them. They didn't seem to mind until the mom intervened.
I could tell both boys were also confused -- both are social butterflies and make friends wherever they go.
They attempt to play with the girls again. Poor little guys didn't want to give it up.

I call them back over, but not before one of the little girls starts to cry.
She runs to her mom and says that the boys hit her.
I was watching and this did not happen. Neither boy ever even touched one of the little girls.
But little miss priss sure made mama think something happened.
I was pretty amazed that a little preschooler could manipulate a twist things so brilliantly and that the mom was oblivious. By brilliantly, I mean, she is probably going to grow up an evil genius.
Could you imagine if I had gone over and told the mom her daughter was a pretty little liar?
And in fairness, at this point, the girls' mothers were starting to get into mamma bear mode too.

I still trying to keep the kids separated, but the boys tried hanging out with the girls a few more times.
By this point, my friend comes near me. I could tell that she was busy taming her mama bear growl too.
I whispered to her that I didn't really know what to do in this situation. She agreed, and said that she would rather teach the kids how to play with everyone.
I agreed.
Then, one little girl gets out of the little pink car, walks over to me and tells me, "We don't want the boys to play with us."
At that point, the boys were not even paying attention to them.
I told her not to worry.
I start to feel myself get defensive again, because I am essentially punishing the boys by forcing them to stay away from little girls because they're simply being divas in the making. I started to feel like their mom's should tell them to be nice. I guess, this was a good lesson for the boys. Not everyone will want to be your friend. Deal with it and move on? That lesson is a little harsh at 4.
Then, of course, our boys get into a little squabble with each other and they trade hits. I'm not quite sure how and why the fight started. We separate them, talk to them individually and have them come back and apologize to each other. And poof, instant best friends again.
While all of this is happening, I hear one of the mothers tell the girls something to the effect of, "this is exactly why we don't play with them. Let's go."
Surprisingly, I let that slide. It's probably because I wasn't certain what they said exactly. But it resonated with me nonetheless. I was annoyed by that comment the whole way home.
Then, I started thinking ...
I would much rather let my kids learn how to handle things on his own rather than swooping in and letting the dust fly.
There isn't one right way how to parent, but there sure are a whole lot of wrong ways. I feel proud that, in this scenario, I believe my friend and I took the high road. Then again, this could be the mama bear in me still growling.

I think it is safe to say that no mama wants their daughter to be a "mean girl."
At least, I hope no mom has that aspiration for their little beauties.
 According to About.com (the tween edition) here is the definition of a mean girl:

 "Mean Girls" is a tween expression used to describe girls who exhibit anti-social behavior known as Relational Aggression. The term was popularized by the movie Mean Girls, starring Lindsay Lohan. Mean girl behavior includes gossip, verbal put downs of others, bullying, backstabbing, and using others to get ahead. 

Mean girls can be found at school, on the bus, and at extra-curricular activities. They are particularly good at turning friend against friend, and they target girls who they are jealous of, or who stick out from the crowd. Mean girls thrive on drama, and often resort to cyberbullying to torment their victims.
Also Known As: Divas, Gossip Girls, Meanies, Frenemy, Relational Aggression, Queen Bees, and Poison Pals.

My son and his friend had the joys of having meeting  duo of mean girls today at the park.
Before I get further into the story, let me throw this disclaimer out: My son is not perfect. Nor is he completely innocent all of the time. He is 4, he is rambunctious and sometimes can be a little rough.
I had a play date today with three other mamas and the majority of kiddos happened to be boys and were 3 and 4-year-olds.
My son and one of his buddies' attention was captured by two little girls. At first, I thought they were precious. Then, I quickly found that they were mean girls in the making.
 They found the girls playing on the jungle gym.
I laughed because the boys were being pirates and the girls were magic butterflies. The little girls ran to this little pink toy car that was attached to a spring.
The little boys were quick to follow.
At first, they headed over to the blue springy car. But, it wasn't long before the girls caught their attention again.
The girls were inside a pink toy car and the boys were hanging out by it.
I made a comment to one of my girlfriends that I was in trouble because Jake was already girl crazy ...
It was cute, all four kiddos were smiling.
All of the sudden one of the moms came from across the playground, came up to the two boys and faux-politely asked them to leave the girls alone.
 I was a little confused to what the problem was.
I felt the mama bear in me start to growl.
My little boy and his friend weren't doing anything wrong.
I was watching them play because I thought it was cute they were chatting up two little girls. The girls' mothers weren't paying as much attention because they were pushing little kids on the baby swings.
In this case, the little boys were being awesome and prior to the mother asking them to get lost, I was proud of how well they were playing.

So, back to taming the mama bear beast I had growling inside ....
I got up and asked the boys to come play with me on the blue toy car.
I didn't address the girls or moms.
Situation diffused, right?
No.
The little guy playing with my son walked over to the pink car again. He didn't have a chance to say anything and, again, wasn't doing anything wrong.
 One of the little girls tells him that they don't want the boys near them. They didn't seem to mind until the point that the mom intervened.
I could tell both boys were also confused -- both are social butterflies and make friends wherever they go.
They attempt to play with the girls again. Poor little guys didn't want to give it up.

I call them back over, but not before one of the little girls starts to cry.
She runs to her mom and says that the boys hit her.
I was watching and this did not happen. Neither boy ever touched one of the little girls.
But, little miss priss sure made mama think something happened.
I was pretty amazed that a little preschooler could manipulate a twist things so brilliantly and that the mom was oblivious. By brilliantly, I mean, she is probably going to grow up an evil genius.
Could you imagine if I had gone over and told the mom her daughter was a pretty little liar?
And in fairness, at this point, the girls' mothers were starting to get into mama bear mode too.

I was still trying to keep the kids separated, but the boys tried hanging out with the girls a few more times. I started to feel bad for them!
By this point, my friend comes near me. I could tell that she was busy taming her mama bear growl too.
I whispered to her that I didn't really know what to do in this situation. She agreed, and said that she would rather teach the kids how to play with everyone.
I agreed.
Then, one little girl gets out of the little pink car, walks over to me and tells me, "We don't want the boys to play with us."
At that point, the boys were not even paying attention to them.
I told her not to worry.
I start to feel myself get defensive again, because I am essentially punishing the boys by forcing them to stay away from little girls because they're simply being divas in the making. I started to feel like their mom's should tell them to be nice.
But, I guess, this was a good lesson for the boys. Not everyone will want to be your friend. Deal with it and move on? That lesson is a little harsh at 4.
Then, of course, our boys get into a little squabble with each other and they trade hits. I'm not quite sure how and why the fight started. We separate them, talk to them individually and have them come back and apologize to each other. And poof, instant best friends again.
While all of this is happening, I hear one of the mothers tell the girls something to the effect of, "this is exactly why we don't play with them. Let's go."
Surprisingly, I let that slide. It's probably because I wasn't certain what they said exactly. But it resonated with me nonetheless. I was annoyed by that comment the whole way home.
Then, I started thinking ...
I would much rather let my kids learn how to handle things on his own rather than swooping in and letting the dust fly.
There isn't one right way how to parent, but there sure are a whole lot of wrong ways. I feel proud that, in this scenario, I believe my friend and I took the high road. Then again, this could be the mama bear in me still growling.

BLEH ...

I'm not too sure what this bloggity blog will be about.
I'm in a funk.
I woke up this morning and my head hurt, my stomach felt like someone punched it and my left kidney was hurting.
Happy Monday, right?
So. Yes. BLEH.
Bleh, in one word, describes exactly how I feel today.
So, how do I get myself out of this Bleh-ness?
 I write.
My hope is that after I get the jumbled mess out of my head, I can motivate myself to make Monday a productive day.
My son Jake, 4, lovingly reminded me yesterday that I had to clean the house.
He says, "I don't like the house dirty, so you need to clean it."
I lovingly responded, "It's Mother's Day, cleaning can wait until tomorrow."
He agreed and says, "OK, you can wait."
I love that he "gives" me permission to do things.
Since turning 4 in March he thinks that he is indeed a big boy.
Bless his little heart.
He just came in with a towel and asked me how to fold it ....
I guess he is trying to take matters into his own hands.
If that doesn't motivate me to clean, I don't know what will.
Obviously, my son is pretty self-sufficient.
I like it, but it worries me as well.
The thought of him growing up as a strong, independent man excites me.
But, currently, he is only 4.
I want him to be a little boy for as long as he can be.
I don't want him to worry about anything other than baseball, bugs and bicycle rides.
I want to do the mom thing. Ha!
He is in the "let me do it" stage.
I think this is the hardest stage for me thus far.
So, I am off to clean and be productive.
I sent Jake off to play and be a kid.

Hair Today, Gone Tomorrow ...

It's hair ... it grows.
Thank you Jesus!
What started out as a genuinely sweet gesture on my part last week took a slightly selfish and unexpected turn ... BUT today, God put things back in perspective for me via social media ... who said Facebook was evil? Not this lady!

OK ...

I feel like I need to rewind and explain myself a little.
Some readers might be scratching their heads while others are trying to connect the dots. BUT, when I am slinging those dots out on the paper like I'm playing a game of frisbee golf after drinking a glass of wine -- it might be hard to follow. (I'm done rewinding .... I kinda ramble while I rewind)

So, I recently cut off 12 inches of hair and plan on donating it to Beautiful Lengths, a non-profit that makes hair pieces for those battling cancer.
I tell my sweet friend, who is cutting my hair, that I want to still be able to put my hair in a ponytail because not being able to do so, drives me nuts. Like, not just a little bit nuts - like A LOT nuts!
I am also not girly.
I don't like to admit it, but I don't know how to fix my own hair and I barely can fix my makeup ...
 I felt like I need it a little long, so I can fake it. After all, I can at least use a curling iron.
After the first initial cut I could put it in a ponytail. It felt a little shorter than wanted, but no biggie.
After evening it out and putting in layers, not a chance.
The way SHE fixed it looked awesome But, as I was starring at it in the mirror, all I could say to myself was "Man, how will I recreate this??????"
Prior to cutting it, I was excited and pumped at the thought of being able to help someone out - even if it is in just a small way.
Then after, I was bummed. Dang it, I couldn't put it in a ponytail .... My problems are huge, right?
I found myself talking about it negatively this weekend. It didn't help that my son (who is 4) has told me everyday since I cut it that he doesn't like it. He also requests regularly that I "put it back" to how it was ...
People would come up and give me compliments this weekend and almost instantly, I would say something like, "Yeah, it's just way shorter than I wanted it."
I seriously began annoying myself. All of my negativity was overshadowing why I do this, which is to help someone fighting cancer.
I saw the following link on Facebook today:

http://vimeo.com/29023856

After watching this, all I could think about was how much I was whining about my hair being two inches shorter than I wanted. This beautiful lady had to shave her head to avoid it falling out in clumps - AND the kicker is that is the least of her worries! There are people out there literally battling for their life. It made me feel selfish and spoiled.
So, finally, I can say that I am proud of my short locks. It is my little way of saying "effff cancer" (you have to watch the video). I also have to thank God for my health. You never know when and if you will get the news that will change your life -- it may be about you, your spouse, a parent, a friend or a child having cancer. I wish no one had to ever hear the words "You have cancer."
Be thankful my friends! I am thankful that God reminded me of that today!

29 candles .. and 29 life lessons

Hey twenties,

It's been real.
We've laughed, we've cried and we've birthed two kids. Actually, there has been a lot of happenings in our tenure.
Now, I know we're not quite done yet twenties ... we still got 390 days together, but I felt the need to pay homage to you and our fleeting moments
So, in honor of my birthday month, I have compiled a list of 29 life lessons that I've learned.

Trust in God. I'm a planner. I like my plans. Sometimes I have to laugh at this little quirk and remind myself that God has the ultimate plan and it is written in pen. I've spent a lot of my teenage years and early adult life relying on myself. I can honestly tell you that once I began relying on God, things seemed to fall into place a little easier.
Be yourself. Trying to be someone else will just make you look silly. Embrace what makes you who you are - even the odd things. I love me some Steven Seagal and I am completely OK saying it out loud.
In the grand scheme of things, life is short. Don't take it for granted.
Travel. One thing I wish I could have done in college was travel abroad. The world is big, explore it.
Appreciate what you have and don't dwell on what you don't. The grass isn't always greener on the other side. If you don't appreciate what God has already given you, how can you expect to appreciate what is yet to come?
Don't always believe what you hear, read or see. Ask questions. Don't take things at face value all of the time. Explore it yourself and form your own opinion.
Take a path less chosen. It can be intimidating not following the crowd at times. But sometimes the crowd isn't right!
Life isn't always fair. Deal with it. Sometimes we perceive that we get the wrong end of the deal and sometimes we actually do. Everything is not always going to go according to our plan.
There are plenty of right ways to parent. If the kid is happy, healthy and loved - the parent is doing their job. Sometimes, we as a society get too nosey. Too many people love giving unsolicited advice ... oddly enough, no one really loves getting it. I have been guilty of this before (more than once even) and I have been given my fair share of unsolicited advice. Lets just stop parents! Can we make a pact? Can I get an Amen?
Make mistakes, but try not to make them twice. We can only hope to learn from out mistakes, take the lesson and learn from it.
Stand up for what you believe in. People might not always agree with what you believe in, but they will respect you for standing up for it.
Eat at a restaurant by yourself. Be comfortable doing things by yourself on occasion. Sometimes it's nice.
You're not always right. This is hard for me sometimes ... ask the hubby ;o) Tell yourself that from time to time. And being opinionated about everything all the time can be stressful and tiring for everyone involved I'm exhausted writing about it.
Let go of the past. That's where it should stay, in the past. Move forward, live in the moment and look forward to the future you're in the process of creating.
Stop. We live in a world where we are constantly going at 120 mph. We rush and hurry through this life so frantically that we don't even notice or appreciate the awesomeness surrounding us.
Marry your best friend. I am committed to my marriage for the long-haul. Thank you God that Chuck constantly makes me laugh. Things could have gotten boring quick.
Approach an alpaca with caution, they spit. I don't think this one needs too much explanation ... but let me tell you, this was a huge life lesson for me.
Smile at a stranger. It could seriously make someone's day. It has made my day turn around in the past.
Dream big. That's the beauty of dreaming, there is no limit. Don't be afraid to act on a dream. Fear is the Debbie downer of emotions - don't let it win.
Take chances. They may not always pan out, but you will never know if you don't try.
Break someone's heart and have your heart broken. It stinks, but I think it is a necessary part of life.
Say no. It's OK to say no. People will respect you more if you say no to the things you can't commit to yet follow through with the things you can. Fact.
Say yes. Sometimes when you're tempted to say no, don't. It might be fun!
Step outside of your comfort zone. There's a whole new world out there, jump in it.
Own your mistakes and failures. Don't make excuses or blame others. Own it. Learn from it. Make yourself a better person.
Pay it forward. Small gestures go a long way.
Avoid debt as much as possible. Easier said than done, right? With the exception of student loans and home mortgage, we recently became debt free. It was a huge relief. It was nice to simplify life.
Work hard. The most rewarding things in life take work. Set goals and set good examples for your kids. After all they're our future. I know I don't want my son or daughter growing up feeling entitled ... I hope that my husband and I instill a great work ethic into the two of them.

Now, I am off to enjoy my last 25 days of being 28 ....

Senseless ... the sad end to Travyon Martin's life

UPDATED: After I wrote this, I read the article posted below.
Trayvon Martin shooting: New details emerge from Facebook and Twitter accounts, witness testimony

The kid wasn't perfect and he had some things in his past that weren't ideal. But, who doesn't? I still have the same issue I did before I saw a more grown up or "gangsta" picture of Trayvon. Zimmerman took the law into his own hands.
He intervened when he should have waited for the police. He should have let them handle it, plain and simple.
Zimmerman is the reason Martin is dead. He was irresponsible in how he dealt with the situation.
I just don't think you can hide behind the stand your ground law when you put someone in a corner and dare them not to react.
..................................................................................................................................................................
His picture has been all over the news for weeks. What stands out most to me is his brilliant smile. I don't know him nor do I know his living situation. But, he looked like a sweet kid.

Travyon Martin, 17, was shot and killed by George Zimmerman, 28, on Feb 26 in the central Florida suburb of Sanford. (It is about 20 miles from Orlando.)
Zimmerman, a neighborhood crime watch captain, claimed self-defense after shooting Martin once in the chest.
Prior to the shooting, Zimmerman called the police to report a suspicious individual wearing a hoodie. Zimmerman was advised by the dispatcher not to continue his pursuit.
Zimmerman ignored the dispatcher and continued following Martin.
The teen was on the phone with his girlfriend and can be heard asking Zimmerman why he was follow him. In turn, the crime watch captain asks Martin: "What are you doing around here?"
Click here for the full article from Good Morning America (GMA).
And click here for a Fort Worth Star-Telegram article about a hoodie march in Arlington.

Details I haven't heard before emerged from the GMA article.
There is a witness who seems to back up Zimmerman's claim that Martin fought with him, according to the article:

"An eyewitness, 13-year-old Austin Brown, told police he saw a man fitting Zimmerman's description lying on the grass moaning and crying for help just seconds before he heard the gunshot that killed Martin.

The initial police report noted that Zimmerman was bleeding from the back of the head and nose, and after medical attention it was decided that he was in good enough condition to travel in a police cruiser to the Sanford, Fla., police station for questioning. He was not arrested."

The article also revealed why Travyon, who was from Miami, was in Sanford. He was suspended from school after he was found in possession of an empty bag of marijuana, according to the report.

"ABC News has also learned that Martin was staying in Sanford at the time because he'd been suspended from Krop High School in Miami after being found with an empty bag of marijuana. He was staying at his father's fiance's house in Sanford."

As far as I am aware, the only people who know what happened during the incident are Zimmerman and Martin. I don't believe anyone else saw the actual shooting.

But the main thing I would like to express is this: the new details, though sensational, make absolutely no difference. So what if Martin wasn't squeaky clean? He had an empty bag of pot. I don't condone drug use, especially by minors, but, does that make him a villain or an aggressor?

It is also possible that that Martin fought with Zimmerman. He may have even went for the gun. But think about it, if you were walking home from the store with a can of tea and skittles and you noticed that an older male was following you, wouldn't you be weirded out or uneasy? I know my behavior might look a little suspicious.
It is one of the basics instincts - flight or fight. So, yes, I wouldn't be surprised if Martin did fight with Zimmerman. BUT, I doubt it was as an instigator. More likely, he was fighting as a scared 17-year-old kid with a man he perceived was threatening him ...

I can only speculate because I, of course, wasn't there. But, you want to know a fact I know to be true?
Travyon would be alive if Zimmerman had listened to the dispatcher, not pursued Martin and left the policing to the police.

From what I can understand from the stand-your-ground law, if Martin was fighting with Zimmerman and did go for the gun, technically Zimmerman may have a claim of self-defense. Here is another excerpt of the article:

"The new information in the emotionally charged case could complicate pressing charges against Zimmerman, which one veteran prosecutor has already said could be difficult.

"The stand-your-ground law is one portion of justifiable use of deadly force," veteran State Attorney Angela Corey told ABC News. "And what that means is that the state must go forward and be able to prove it's case beyond a reasonable doubt… So it makes the case in general more difficult than a normal criminal case."

But here is the problem I have with it: He was the aggressor and the catalyst in this death. If you take him out of the equation there wouldn't have been an incident.  Zimmerman caused Martin's death.
Where is the justice?

knock knock ... whose there? GOD

I am convinced that God has a pretty awesome sense of humor.
How else could you explain Alpacas?
I'm going to post a picture of two Alpacas below after I get done with this little ditty annnnnd I dare you not to laugh.
And what about Giraffes?
Such strange little - well big - creatures.
I am not going to lie, I giggle a little every time I see one.
(side note: I wonder what they sound like? The sound in my head is pretty funny.)
He often shows his funny bone when trying to get his point across to me.
I can be a little hard-headed at times.
I was reminded of his sense of humor today via song.
God Gave Me You by Blake Shelton, to be exact.
The song itself isn't funny.
But when I heard it today, I was reminded of a fight I had with Chuck this summer.
That is how the song eventually became funny.
I honestly don't remember what the fight was about. I just remember texting him that day if I needed to communicate with him because "I didn't want to hear his voice."
The hubs and I don't really fight much.
We bicker.
Sometimes, we squabble.
But rarely do we have a huge blow up.
I can count on one hand how many blow ups we've had in the 8 years of togetherness ... AND I would have a few fingers to spare!
That day, we had the mother of all blow ups. (Probably over something dumb.)
I needed to clear my head, so I went for a drive.
When I turned on my car, the song was playing ...
"God gave me you for the ups and downs ...."
Bleh - I didn't want to hear that song at all - especially when I was so mad at my significant other.
So, I changed the station ....
"God gave me you for the days of doubt ...."
Are you kidding me?
I really didn't want to hear that song - so I switched to a Top 40s station.
" ... for when I think I lost my way, there are no words left to say it's true .. God gave me you"
I seriously could not get away from the dang song.
I thought to myself: "Surely it won't come on again on the station I started on" .... So, I make the fourth and final switch.
" .... God gave me you ..."
By that point, all I could do was burst into laughter.
"You got me God ... 
You made your point!"
I felt an appreciation for my hubby right then.
I called Chuck to make my amends.
Now when I hear the song, I smile.
And laugh.
Sometimes God speaks the loudest when you don't want to listen.
Knock knock ...
who is there?
God.

 I mean seriously, how funny are these two?

News Flash ...

This just in ...
I am a little bit of a news junkie.
I like reading everything from local to global - from the "feel good" to the "Debbie downer" kind of stuff.
Here is some quick hits on items that piqued my interest today:

Vincent Jackson signs $55,555,555 (ocho cincos) contract with Buccaneers

I may be completely wrong, but Jackson may not be worth all this hoopla ... $55 million is not chump change! He is an amazing player and a huge beast .... He was also a bit of a drama queen last year (not all his fault), but a distraction nonetheless. He also turns 30 in January ... That is kind of old in WR years. So, the Bucs are going to invest that much on someone who is approaching the downhill slide of their career and is known for being a bit of a diva ... ask Randy Moss or T.O. how much it has paid off acting a fool.One just signed a one-year deal with San Fran after practically begging teams to give him a chance and the other is playing with a North Texas indoor arena football team that has about 150 people in the stands ....
I think Mr. Jackson will do the Bucs good the first year or two as long as he isn't making bratty princess demands... we shall see on the rest.


In other news ....
Robbers hold up man in wheelchair in Fort Wort

Read more here: http://www.star-telegram.com/2012/03/13/3807736/robbers-hold-up-man-in-wheelchair.html#storylink=cpy

There is low ... and then there is this. An elderly man on a motorized wheelchair was robbed at gunpoint by two stellar individuals. What kind of person does that? I am guessing someone who is making a living stealing from others doesn't have much of a moral compass, but c'mon man! I hope the scumbags are caught ASAP!



Also ....
Forget stealing copper fellas ... here is what the thieving community is buzzing about now:
500 Pound Beehive Stolen From Outside Houston Restaurant

Who knew bee hives were such a hot commodity? Having them around seems annoying to me. BUT, I do like the end result.


And finally ...

Billionaire Says Her Kids Aren’t Fit for Inheritance

When I read this headline, originally, I thought: "Good for her." 

I worked hard for everything I have and I will expect my children to earn what they're given as well.

But, after reading the story, there seems to be some untold tidbits lurking between the lines. For starters, the article says she inherited her empire from her father. It also states that her children were gives a stake in the trust. But, mommy dearest decided they were unfit to have it and took legal action to block them from the trust. Maybe she has good intentions and her kids could possibly be immature little brats. 

Bottom line, I would rather have my modest life with lots of love and laughter than having all of that money drama.

Who is ready for baseball season?

If our walls could talk, they might say we are the  most patriotic family in America.
Every night, we end the same way: singing The National Anthem, or "Oh say" as Jake likes to call it.

In fact, at Jake's suggestion, the three of us serenaded our fussy baby with "Oh say" on the way home from bible study last night.
It worked (Jake knows his stuff).
Don't get me wrong, we love America and all, but that is not this reason we sing "Oh say."
Baseball is why we belt out "Oh say."

My little dude has seen a lot of baseball in his 3 years and 11 months and a handful of days on earth and actually knows the sport really well  (daddy works for The Fort Worth Cats Baseball Team)
Every game started the same way "Oh say can you see ..."
And every game ended the same way: with Jake going to talk to "his" baseball players in the locker room.
Last season was the best one yet - despite being massively preggers and sitting in the stands in the sweltering heat almost every night.
Jake was old enough to go out on the field and play catch with his daddy and he was big enough to gather up supplies after the game.
I think he felt proud being able to help.
 I drug my big 'ole belly there last summer because it made my little man's face light up, which obviously made my heart melt!
I always received compliments from fellow fans on how well-behaved Jake was watching the game (he would sit through the whole dang thing and keep his eyes glued to the action).
I would always smile like, any proud mamma would.
BUT, I knew that it wasn't my doing. My little dude just loves baseball so much he gave the perception of being a perfect little angel.
This year, he won't just be sitting in the stands watching... he will become a player. Not for The Cats of course ... we signed him up for a t-ball team along with two of his cousins.
The season starts at the end of the month ... I can't wait!
Chuck and I were laughing the other day, but we are actually a little worried that Jake may freak out if "The Naional Anthem" doesn't play before his games ...
The Cats will also kick things off in May.
And Jake will be promoted with the Cats.
He will likely be a ball boy this year and actually get to wear a uniform and sit on the bench with "his" players popping sunflower seeds.
I will be in the stands being one proud mamma.

How 'bout them changes?

"If nothing ever changed, there'd be no butterflies."  ~Author Unknown

Change.
I don't like it.
I think, mostly because it puts me in uncharted territory and I get uncomfortable.
I like predictable. It is comforting. It is the OPPOSITE if change. But, it is also boring.
And just because something is comfortable, doesn't mean it is the best thing for you.
Ruts can be comfortable.
Shortly before Kaylea was born, I had a revelation.
Chuck and I were stuck in a rut.
We moved back to Fort Worth in the summer of 2008 and since then, had made no effort to build friendships or make new friends. We were quite content living in our own bubble. My bubble was comfortable.
Well, the day of Kaylea's babyshower, it hit me: I had no friends.
I looked around the shower and only saw family. Don't get me wrong - I LOVE my family. My sisters are my best friends ... but you HAVE to be friends with your family. You don't have a choice ;o)
I had no real friends who chose to be my friend.
That fact really hurt my heart.
I went to the bathroom and called Chuck sobbing (keep in mind I was VERY hormonal at the time).
Chuck came to the same conclusion about himself as well.
I waited awhile to come out of the bathroom to regain my composer, but when I came out, I still had the red-eyed cryface. I was embarrassed to reveal why I was crying. I eventually got over it enough to enjoy the rest of the shower that my mother worked hard to plan for me.
But that feeling resonated with me.
My New Year's resolution was to "check in" to life. I didn't want to keep sitting on the sidelines and watching. It was safe yet boring.
We started going to a new church in November. We really enjoyed it. But, we weren't really getting involved - just attending, sitting stagnant and receiving the message.
At the end of January they had a tailgate party/chili cook-off for people to come and talk to different Lifegroups (bible study).
They started promoting it about a month in advance. I remember telling Chuck I was interested in attending.
We put it on the calendar.
Then, Chuck saw in the church flyer that the church had a Mothers of preschoolers group (MOPS) and suggested that I check it out when we go to the church's tailgating party ...
Again, I was unsure and uncomfortable.
BUT, I went to their booth during the event and signed up.
I remember leaving the tailgate party so happy. Both Chuck and I ventured out of our comfort zone's and initiated conversations with various groups of people.

I went to my first MOPS group earlier this month, and it was great. I met some awesome women and it was nice to have some adult conversation.
The main person I talk to throughout the day is a 4-year-old little boy.
His favorite topic is poop.
I can't stress enough how refreshing it was to have some adult conversation!

We also found a Lifegroup to start attending.
Tonight was our second meeting.
When we started attending the church, I remember Chuck saying he would be uncomfortable going to somebody's house for a bible study. I agreed.
We were nervous at first, but I am glad we didn't let that stop us. We have met some really nice couples.
We are really putting ourselves out there.
BUT more importantly, w are both taking steps to have a better relationships with God. And I have noticed that we are happier as a married couple.
We started thinking and came to the conclusion that other than fantasy football (which is fun but not productive), we didn't have anything that was "our thing."
I have my interests and Chuck has his.
We are polar opposites. It works for us and I think we have a great relationship. But, I think it was getting too comfortable.
Having this group to attend together can be one of  "our things."
In our Lifegroup, we are reading a book called Crazy Love.
We read the first chapter Saturday and then had an in depth conversation that did not involve our children as the main topic.
It was nice.
It was a change of pace.
Again, just because something is comfortable, doesn't mean it is the best thing for you.
I encourage everyone to get out of their comfort zone.
It was one of the best decisions I have ever made.

(side note: Since January, we have also started working out and eating better and I quit my job to stay at home with the kids. We also haven't smoked since February of 2011. Changes are a good thing!)

I'm new here ...

I am taking the blogging world by storm.
Watch out blog readers, here I come!
You will laugh, you will cry and you may even scratch your head every now and again.
But, here I am cyber world, hear me roar!


I haven't decided if there will be a method to my madness quite yet. Actually, I kind of jumped in without thinking twice. But, I am thinking that this will be a place to share and discuss newsworthy topics -  anything from sports to parenting and anything in between.
I also think I will share my stories about going from a twenties-something news reporter to a stay-at-home mom (SAHM) of two. I am not going to lie, it has been quite an adjustment and I am learning everyday.


So, although I don't know exactly what direction this blog will take, one thing is clear: I have always felt compelled to write.


With that being said, I haven't written more than a Facebook post or an email in a little over 3 months ... coincidentally, my daughter Kaylea turned 3 months old on Feb. 11. As I tried to fall asleep last night, my mind was racing. I couldn't seem to settle down. I kept wondering what in the world was going on - normally as soon as my head hits the pillow, I am down for the count. And almost instantaneously as I was thinking that thought, I said to myself, "I need to start writing again."


Writing soothes this girl's soul.


Writing has always been therapeutic for me. It didn't really matter the topic. There's a lot more that goes into writing than slapping down words on paper (or hammering down on keys in most cases these days). I enjoyed the challenge of structuring something just right or playing with wording - hence the title of this blog "Write through the heart." So, for me, it didn't matter if I was writing an article about the city's budget woes or writing in my personal journal - both were equally therapeutic. Let me just say as a reporter, my writing needs were met.


As a new SAHM - that need wasn't being met. I have been busy getting my SAHM-mode on.
Joining a mom's group. Check.
Reading up on arts and crafts to do with the kids. Check.
Doing arts and crafts. Check.
Worrying I am screwing up my kid's learning abilities by teaching him myself. Check.
Reassuring myself that this is the best thing for the family and I am not screwing up my kid's learning abilities by teaching him myself. Check.
Looking up and preparing new recipes for meals. Check.
Finding places to take Jake so he can interact with other kids. Check.
Learning how to manage my time to do all the house work, play with the kids, insure everyone is bathed and make breakfast, lunch and dinner. Check ... work in progress!


I feel like I am embracing my new role as a SAHM. I am growing closer to my son Jake, who turns 4 next month. And I feel like I am not missing out on Kaylea's growth. It is so crazy how much they change in that first year.


But, I eventually want to jump back into the reporting gig (or something that closely relates to it). Not only was my lack of writing making me restless, I also feared I could forget  it. "YOU DON'T USE IT YOU LOSE IT" you often hear ...
And don't give me the cliched "... it's just like riding a bike..." Yeah, I tried riding a bike a few years ago after no being on one since childhood and I was horrible and kept falling!


So, I think this blog will serve that purpose! 


Here it goes ...


Hi, my name is Adrian. This is my first time to blog and I look forward to getting to know you!